Love

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." Alfred Lord Tennyson


Would you agree with that?
How many scenarios in your life can you apply this quote to?
Love is so tricky to navigate isn't it?
It changes on a dime unpredictable like the weather hot one moment then cold the next, tranquil then tempestuous.
Love is a deep ocean of emotions and secrets that sometimes never surface.
Why is it so scary? The pain maybe?
Love is bliss but boy can it cause serious damage.
In my experience it always goes from 0 to 100 in seconds then crashes and burns almost as quickly as it all began.
The only love that has never let me down is the love I feel from the Holy Father above, my parents and my kids. I have no doubt that kind of love exists perhaps because I've never had to question it.  
Love from the opposite sex however has given me a much different experience.
At one point I stopped believing in it. I figured it was just chemical like animals and pheromones.
The moment I laid eyes on my child I knew the love I felt from her father could never be compared.
Which raised the question, how do you know when it's real?
It's a feeling isn't it? Deep in the pit of your soul.
I thought I felt that. A few times now for a few different men. I don't feel like it was ever reciprocated though and that's excruciating. I realize now that love has different levels. There are apexes, plateaus and valleys. I know I've been loved but I question how much? If it was powerful enough then why didn't it sustain? Why did it come to an end? Why has it always faded and died? Why do I still feel it inside? What was it that they felt? Did they feel anything?
As difficult as it is to gauge your own feelings wouldn't that make gauging someone else's purely impossible? If someone tells you they love you how likely are you to believe them?
I don't want to go through life with the thought that my heart has been closed off to love the entire time. I also don't want to deplete my love supply on guys who aren't able to reciprocate and refuel my tank. I happen to agree with Mr. Tennyson's quote. I have loved and lost and though most times it ended in hurt I've learned. I still love them to this very day and I don't believe it will ever truly go away. Love gets trapped in the heart and once it's found it's way in there is rarely ever a way back out.
Love is fuel for our souls.
Love is worthy.
Love is good.
Love teaches.
Love stays.
Love knows.
Love.