All the time in the World

I cant figure out why but I feel as though I'll live a short life. My daughter asked me what my biggest question was about life. I thought it through and decided it's when am I going to die? I feel like accomplishments speak volumes and I've accomplished all of mine. I don't do daring things, I'm not much of a drinker. I drive fast but not with the kids in the car which is most of the time. I don't travel much or very far, I don't fly and I normally don't try things that might make me die. So I think to myself sometimes why am I so ready to die? Why am I convinced that I'll live a short time? I suppose it's a matter of crossing sides. I'm put off with where life has met up with life and how the world turned dark from bright. I'm disillusioned by living in this World because I know the beauty it holds but looking around me tells a different story than I've been told. One of depression and worry. Living is not the anticipation of enjoyment but enjoying the moment. Happiness is not day to day it is a way of life. The willing will always be willing and the sacrifices are documented by grace. Givers will always be giving, until the day they have none to give away. Blessings arrive by the boatloads when you pray and worry washes away with each passing day. An idle mind is a wretched possession and should be managed with caution. Leaving anything sitting idle too long will cause it to disintegrate and become dilapidated. I don't want to rush through this life and in the end be thinking of all of the time I wasted chasing things that don't mean anything to me. Life is short enough without the added pressure to become what you want without knowing when your time is up. I'd never start anything if I knew beforehand I didn't have enough time to complete it. I'd never eat a half cooked chicken. I'd never make my bed with wet linens. So why start something you can't finish? I never know when the bells going to ring, the fat lady will sing, when the alarm will sound or when the sand will run out. I pray my goals will be met by my accomplishments and when my final sun does finally set my life will be content with my death.