Much better than this

It won't get much better than this until my useless rants become our everyday topics. I'm waiting for my friend, my in, my win, my end. I can't hide from this lesson he's tryin to give. I can't get away from his contagious grin. I felt like I deserved a second glance so I slowed up so he could be down and have his second chance. Is he down? I can't be for certain right now. I'm hoping all goes well. All I can do is wait on what is comin. I'm so impatient but it's taking me a minute to let it sink in that I need to wait my turn. They say the good things are worth the wait but what I have in store for me is not just good its great. I watch the World change everyday while I just stay the same. Sometimes I feel ashamed. Sometimes I pray. Mostly I still just wait. I'm hoping one day I'll get the chance to ride that wave. It looks like such fun but my number just hasn't come. I tend to always lose my place when first come, first serve is a race. I refuse to stand in a long ass line with everybody else when I can't even see the name of the ride. When everybody is trying to get on at the same time. They all want the same thing while the thrill I'm lookin for is so much more than they could ever even ask for. I'd rather sneak in through the side door and cut the line, step up to the top and just let it drop me off. I want the loop to loop, I want the fastest ride, I need to be topsy turvied and turned upside down so instead of a frown I'm wearing a smile on my face. I wish I could remove the negative thoughts from my head. I wish he was already waking up in my bed. I wish I could have just a sneak peak of what lays ahead. But life is no drive thru and I won't get any projections on the big screen anytime soon. He says to fall back but it's spring forward. I've always been one to think ahead, plan for the future and hit fast forward. I'm the star of my own feature. I'm not used to sharing the spotlight. I'm not used to taking direction. I'm always the director and the producer of my own creations. I guess the times are a changing. That must mean I'm changing too then. I can never concisely describe what type of mood I'm in. It's just too soon to tell y'all what I'm goin thru. The world will just have to wait and see with me. Stand by me when I'm still and walk with me when it gets real. If you think you've seen my best yet, just wait, it gets much better than this, I just haven't pressed play. ;j